| As the engine roar melted to a kitten purr and our boat | | | | patch of waterfront paradise, soaked up the afternoon |
| nuzzled up to the Caye Caulker pier, we did a quick | | | | sun, and flipped through back issues of Mexican |
| inventory check. Dancing palms, tick. Sun bleached | | | | celebrity gossip magazines found discarded in our |
| beach, tick. Island motto, "Go Slow", painted lazily on a | | | | room - anything to keep our minds off the fact that |
| signpost stuck in the sand, tick. I gave my partner in | | | | our days of sloth were numbered. Back at the |
| crime a private smile. This was the place. We'd | | | | bungalow we hatched our plan. We were not giving up |
| escaped...for now.Bobbing up and down against a tiny | | | | our life of leisure that easily. We would go down |
| Belizean island on the Caribbean Sea wasn't in the | | | | partying. Caye Ambergris awaited and I had a birthday |
| original script. The plan had been to fly into Belize for a | | | | to celebrate.As the largest, most developed, and most |
| quick taste of eco-adventure before slipping over the | | | | expensive of the Belizean islands, Caye Ambergris |
| Guatemalan border. But we'd got greedy, and four | | | | caters well for the first class holiday seeker, with a |
| days later, we were still there with our hands caught in | | | | range of villas, luxury home stays and resorts to |
| the action jar. Jungle hikes, eco-tours, Jaguar spotting, | | | | choose from. To prepare for our last stand, we |
| cave tubing, Mayan ruins and mountain bike treks. | | | | checked into the mysteriously named Sun Breeze |
| Where would it end? The equatorial heat was on. | | | | Beach Hotel, close to the main town of San Pedro, for |
| We'd needed a place to lay low for a couple of days. | | | | some pampering and creature comforts. The spacious |
| Somewhere a man could find a secluded beach and | | | | rooms, resort style swimming pool, Jacuzzi, massage |
| lie back and think of England, or anywhere else he'd | | | | studio, swanky outdoor bar, and international flavoured |
| rather not be. After making a few discreet inquiries we | | | | restaurant were a world away from the Gilliganism's |
| knew there was only one place to hide, and only one | | | | of Caye Caulker, but at only USD125 a night, my inner |
| man powerful enough to help us get there. The man | | | | Thurston Howell the third was calling.Pandered, |
| known only as, "The Marine Terminal ticket booth | | | | pleasured, and fed in ways that only money can buy, |
| guy".So we paid for our boat passes in small, | | | | we climbed to the lookout over the hotel bar. Slipping in |
| unmarked bills, jumped aboard the first vessel bound | | | | the hammock, we witnessed one of the most beautiful |
| for the islands, and left the spoils of mainland | | | | sunsets the Caribbean has to offer. Swinging back and |
| adventure in our wake. Not that the warm blue coastal | | | | forth with a birthday cocktail in hand, I could truly |
| waters were fooling us. Home to more than one | | | | appreciate how delightfully far we were from anything |
| hundred and seventy islands, or cayes, and the world's | | | | resembling an office cubicle. Contemplation over, I |
| second largest barrier reef, it wouldn't be easy to keep | | | | made my final charge into the night. Crazy Canucks |
| our hands off a bounty of aquatic fun that has | | | | Bar, crazy Canadian in tow, we drank, laughed and |
| tempted travellers since Blackbeard and his Buccaneer | | | | danced embarrassingly to reggae music until |
| posse cruised these waters back in the 1600's. Yet, as | | | | sunrise.The following days we gorged on water sports |
| we stood on this unassuming wharf and watched our | | | | as fast as Caye Ambergris could dish them up. There |
| getaway vessel pull out of dock, the captain turned to | | | | was diving amongst some of the world's most |
| us with some re-assuring words of advice, "Relax | | | | beautiful coral reefs, sailing tours around the island, |
| mon. You're on Caye Caulker time now".If Gilligan had | | | | deep-sea fishing for sailfish and barracuda, jet skiing |
| ever taken up real estate development, Caye Caulker | | | | and paragliding off the sun-tickled beaches. Oh how |
| town would have been his Big Apple. Dozing | | | | we feasted!Our hunger for aqua adventure finally |
| peacefully on this slip of an island, the cluster of brightly | | | | satiated, we wandered into town, plonked our behinds |
| painted ramshackle beach hideaways, deserted beach | | | | on the nearest bikes for rent, and peddled to the far |
| lots, scattered fishing boats, palm trees, sand floor | | | | reaches of the island. Crossing a small river by |
| restaurants, dive huts, and salty old sailors propping up | | | | man-pulling-rope-very-hard-powered ferry to the less |
| bars at 11am in the morning, makes for the perfect | | | | populated north island, we cycled along remote dirt |
| getaway haven.The jewels in Caye Caulker's crown | | | | tracks lined with sweeping palm trees. Emerging from |
| are it minimalist pleasures. No international resorts, | | | | the bush onto the beach at the edge of the lapping |
| flashy nightclubs, or peak hour traffic. Remember the | | | | blue Caribbean, it was a leisurely ride along long |
| motto? Go slow. Our mission, and yes we did choose | | | | stretches of white squeaky sand to the "money" end |
| to accept it, was to find a bungalow for as little as | | | | of town.The north beach plays host to luxurious resort |
| forty dollars per night on a quiet stretch of squeaky | | | | bungalows and private beach villas. I pondered |
| white sand, treat our palates to an array of seafood | | | | ambitiously over the For Sale sign standing outside one |
| delights, and then debrief over a drink at a beach bar | | | | particularly hedonistic abode. Apparently, the former |
| watching the sun slip beneath a sheet of Caribbean | | | | owner wasn't happy about motoring his 80ft cruiser |
| blue sea. This message will self-indulge in five | | | | around all that coral nonsense to moor outside his |
| seconds.Before long, we'd slipped into the "no shoes, | | | | beach palace. Being the entrepreneurial type, he'd used |
| no shirt, no problem" and "sarong, swimsuit, smile" dress | | | | a few sticks of dynamite to blast a neat little driveway |
| code, and immersed ourselves amongst the | | | | straight through the reef. Unfortunately, the |
| welcoming band of eclectic castaways. It soon | | | | government didn't see it that way and sent him a fine |
| became clear that the local brew of Creoles, Central | | | | big enough to clear the Belize national debt. He was |
| Americans, and Europeans posed little threat to our | | | | last seen paddling a canoe in the direction of Cuba.A |
| relaxation plans. However, we'd have to keep tabs on | | | | little further along we stumbled across Captain |
| the North American retirees swerving along the | | | | Morgan's Retreat, setting of the original Temptation |
| streets in rickety old golf carts, sending dogs, children | | | | Island show. As we stood outside the Mecca of |
| and loitering tourists running for cover.For three perfect | | | | televised drama, so many touching memories came |
| days we hid behind sunglasses, cocktail umbrellas and | | | | flooding back. Amber and Troy whispering under a |
| lobster menus, wondering if maybe, just maybe, there | | | | palm tree, probably discussing the effects of global |
| would be no more calls to action, and life really was a | | | | warming. Shawana ditching Gary and confessing to |
| beach after all. Then one night, whilst minding our own | | | | Chad 'you had me at "are those things real?"' At that |
| business over a couple of tall Panty Rippers at | | | | moment, I couldn't help but appreciate the truly |
| Popeye's Bar and Restaurant, the bartender told us a | | | | important things in life. I turned to the ski bunny and told |
| man had been in asking questions. "Did he know | | | | her she had a smile so beautiful it could almost pass |
| anyone who might like to explore the reef?" "Had he | | | | as cosmetically enhanced.Peddling across the beach |
| seen any tourists dance so badly to the reggae band | | | | towards town for the last time before heading back to |
| they couldn't possibly show their faces around the | | | | the mainland, we waved goodbye to all the things we |
| island?" The next morning, we went to see a man | | | | loved about the cayes. The lazy palm trees, the ivory |
| about a snorkelling tour.Whilst experienced divers | | | | white sands, the aqua blue waters, the hammocks |
| prefer the more exciting sites in the waters off Caye | | | | swinging in the breeze, the friendly faces, the plastic |
| Ambergris, the beautiful calm reefs of Caye Caulker | | | | whale and dolphin fountain splashing water over Jesus |
| offered the ideal setting for first timer submariners like | | | | outside the pink Jehovah's Witness mansion...the what? |
| my nervous companion, a Canadian mountain girl, much | | | | Anyway, for a couple of repeat adventure travel |
| more at ease in a set of ski's than a pair of | | | | offenders, it sure made a nice place for a day pass or |
| flippers.After the initial disappointment of learning that | | | | two.Some have said I spend too much time living in a |
| this wasn't my chance to wear a tight rubber body suit | | | | fantasy world, that I need to get a grip on reality. |
| in public, the reef snorkelling trip turned out to be a | | | | Sometimes I think they're right. But then again, they've |
| fantastic experience. We goggled and gawked at the | | | | probably never been to the Belizean cayes.Simon Hillier |
| amazing array of fish, eels, and spectacular coral | | | | is a freelance writer based in Sydney, Australia. His |
| formations. The highlight of the three-hour tour was | | | | company, Get There Writing Services, provides |
| Shark Ray Alley, where Nurse sharks circled our wary | | | | copywriting, travel writing, feature articles, scripts and |
| group from a distance before weaving in for a closer | | | | ebooks that will have your readers clicking and |
| look, and the Southern Ray stingrays slid their | | | | streaming for more. For further information on Simon's |
| expansive wings over our bodies. Both proved to be | | | | article services, visit the feature articles and travel |
| fairly harmless, if perhaps a little fresh for a first | | | | writing section of the Get There Writing Services |
| date.For the rest of the day hardly a word was | | | | website. |
| spoken. Mountain girl and I adjourned to our secluded | | | | |